(Originally penned around 18th April)

SPRING! Let’s all bellow it together now, SPRING!

Gosh I’ve missed her…

I am a warm bloodied goat-boy so I need to hibernate. It’s quite important. Personally I think we should do away with the tradition of winter altogether. Ban the damn thing I say. What good has ever come of it? And whose silly idea was winter anyway? I bet it was the romans. Probably Caligula.

Anyhoo, I’m technically an all-weather goat but your-own-personal-god, damnit! I need my sun!

Its 21 degrees out here (At the time of writing)! Id almost forgotten what vitamin D tastes like. And I’ll tell you precisely how British Vitamin D tastes. It tastes exactly like a great pint of British ale in a great British beer garden with a great British book or note pad and writing implements. Boom. One happy British goat boy.

And oh what it is to be alive in British spring time.

Ladles and jelly spoons, I present to you: my office for the next few months.

2018-05-13 18.05.30

I may dip my hooves in the lake, I may rax out upon the jetty.

Occasionally the odd fisher-person, holiday maker or nature pursuer will pass me by and we’ll exchange a pleasantry or two.

The water here is almost always calm. The geese are boisterous but still worth a gander. Like I, the proper water fowl round these parts are demure and un-encroaching.

There’s the odd bit of litter hither and tither – a can of Monster Sugar Content, or crumpled packet of Lambert and Butler, or a Colonel Mc Coronary’s burger wrapper that some dullard or other has discarded. But otherwise the place is relatively clear, clean and sterile of human impingement.

Yes, I shall be most happy here. There’s the odd honk of the aforementioned gooseys and digital bleep from the hard core fishing enthusiasts’ rig.

But otherwise, we are peaceful and calm. Tranquil.

So, the next few posts published will undoubtedly have been fruited from this spot.

I consider myself very lucky.

There follows a little taste of the spring time awesomeness that I have been lucky enough to spot and things I have missed over the long and barren cold season:


A fine, happy and healthy summer to you all.

The Satyr.